Sincerely, Savvy

Warning: This is going to be about non-Christian beliefs. Please do not comment your thoughts about Christianity, or science. I know the difference between religion and science. My father in law (as well as my husband, and I) believe(d) in Christ, and in the All-Father. Please respect that.

I still don’t know how to act like a functioning adult, especially when having to keep up professional appearances.

Three days for bereavement leave, when it is immediate family, feels insulting. I know I’m lucky that my company even offers it, but it would have been nice to comfortably take five to seven days off under bereavement leave.

Grief doesn’t have a timeline. It was compounded last week by worrying about losing my job, because of unscheduled absences due to my father-in-law’s sudden death. I‘ll still lose hours, because my existing PTO and the pittance of bereavement leave, didn’t cover all 40 hours last week.

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I should probably start somewhere at a beginning.

My husband and I moved from Minnesota to Florida, in the fall of 2020. We had decided that we needed to be nearer to my husband’s father. For at least as long as he was still alive. Not that, at the time my father in law was in any real danger of dying.

Much like myself, my husband grew up with his parent’s no longer together. So he spent as much time as he could with his father, but it was never enough. Around 2012, Woody (my father in law), moved to Florida with his younger brother (Kevin). The majority of that story is irrelevant, but do know that Kevin was “living past his expiration date” having beaten a terminal cancer two years earlier. Dad (Woody), stayed in Florida after Kevin’s cancer returned, and this time did end Kevin’s life. My husband (Anthony), spent a lot of time, thinking about moving closer to his father after that, but for reasons that are not mine to disclose, Anthony was not able to do that immediately.

So, I was more than happy to move to Florida, when we did, to allow my husband to foster the relationship that he so deeply desired to have with his father. The past two years have been wonderful. I have never loved a man, more deeply as a father figure, barring my own father. Being able to watch the emotional rift between Anthony and Woody heal, scar, and disappear completely was touching. Watching the two of them together, helped me to overcome and heal some of my own wounds, in how I felt about my own relationship with my father.

Woody was always a bit closed off, and not interested in sharing much about himself, which we never pushed or pried. If he wanted us to know something, he would let us know. If we ever wanted to ask him about things, then he would either indulge our curiosity, or he would bluntly inform us that it was none of our business. It was always left at that.

When I noticed Woody wearing an ax pendant with Celtic knotwork one day, I asked him, “Is that supposed to represent Thor’s hammer?” He looked at my sideways, and said “It is Thor’s hammer.” I was a little surprised. I honestly, never expected my father in law to be wearing something like it. So I followed up with another question, “Dad! Are you Norse Pagan?” He looked at me fully this time, with this mix of mischief and annoyance, that I swear only Woody had ever mastered, and simply stated, “Yeah.” As if to imply, that I was an imbecile for even questioning it. That’s the thing with Woody though, and his personal knack for coming off mischievous and annoyed, he wasn’t at all perturbed by my inquiry. Things were just fact, or not fact.

Shortly before his passing, Anthony and I went to the hospital, to say our goodbyes. During our time there, we removed all of his jewelry, save for a ring that he wore on his right ring finger, because that single digit was too swollen to remove the ring. We have no idea how long he had worn it, but my husband and I both noticed that the ring said “Jesus” around the band. When my husband picked up Woody’s cremains this past week, my husband was handed a small zip seal bag, which held a light dusting of cremains, and the Jesus ring. Seeing as Woody so adamantly pointed out that he still believed in Christ, and was a Norse Pagan, I have to belief that Christ saw him through his death.

With that being said, I have to belief, that the All-Father saw him into his afterlife. There was a single crow, that was always outside in the mornings. I came to calling it Haha, because it would make that sound, every morning. It seemed to me, that it did that, until I located what treetop it was in, and said “Good morning, Haha.” Haha wasn’t there a month ago, when I found dad. As a matter of fact, I didn’t hear or see Haha for the past month. This morning, as Anthony and I were leaving for work. I heard it. “Haha.” I looked around. “Haha.” That’s when I looked up, and there it was, Haha. I had mentioned to Anthony, on the morning of what would be the day that dad passed away, that I hadn’t seen Haha at all on that Saturday. Throughout the rest of that Sunday, I also did not see or hear Haha. I wondered aloud, half joking, “Maybe Haha is watching over dad, waiting to escort him (dad) to Valhalla, or Folkvangr.” Later that evening, on September 25th, 2022 dad passed. I think Haha was gone, because dad needed a guide to the next existence.

(I go by Savvy, and my pronouns are They/Them.)

Please stop wearing/posting Handmaid’s Tale costumes. Atwood did not have BIPOC, and LGBTQIA+ people in mind, when writing that story. They were already the ostracized outcasts in that story. Handmaid’s Tale was never about the reclamation and justice for the minorities that were the most affected. Wearing the garb of the Of(s), is giving the Them the power they so desire. There is no uniform for a revolution. We need to weaponize our words, our votes, and ourselves. We need to support, organize, and campaign for change. That starts with looking outside of ourselves, and seeing who this will affect the most first.

The overturning of Roe v. Wade is abhorrent. Never mistake that. However, if you are white, in a hetero relationship, and not of child bearing age, you are NOT the target of these laws. Use your race, age, and affluency to protect those that cannot or are kept from protecting themselves. This overturning is just the start, as evidenced by the many articles indicating that Justice Clarence Thomas, and many others are already discussing to go after next. This is just the beginning friends. Be prepared. Be informed. Be safe.

If you are open to offering support and assistance, be sincere in your intentions. Offer what you can, where you can, but be sure that you are ensuring your own safety, before ensuring the safety of others. Be aware of what you state and offer online, as we will be moving into situations that may become, or feel like, we are living in a police state. Be vigilant. Be aware. Be safe. We protect those, that cannot protect themselves.

My DMs are always open. I am currently unable to offer much more than that. I am happy to offer assistance with researching, and creating resources for those that need. I can do most things data entry related, but am limited on my ability to do things in person. Please reach out to me via Facebook, Twitter, and Discord.
I go by SavvyDryadBunny on all of those. Please feel free to use my words, as your own, but ensure that you are sincere in your intentions, and change my social information to your social information.

Well, the cat is out of the bag. I have left (Redacted), and am now working for (Redacted). This is GREAT NEWS in the long run, because it’s less stress, more pay, and better benefits. Here’s the sitch though, I am going to be without medical insurance for about 3 months. Now hypothetically, and hopefully, by the time this post goes live, I will have the good news that I can ride on my husband’s plan for that timeframe. However, it’s a slim chance, because SURPRISE! I will be working at the same company he works at.

The biggest problem with possibly not having any health insurance for 3 months, is that I have medications, that I have to get refilled every thirty days (not eligible for ninety days). I also have at least one major procedure, that needs to be done sooner, rather than later, that I am already waiting to be scheduled for. Which unfortunately, will likely end up falling inside of the 3 month probationary period for my new job. The husband is busting his patoot, to finish his current commissions, so that he can take on more, while I am still trying to find freelance work.

We’re currently succeeding in maintaining dollar for dollar donation matching, with the GoFundMe, and our intention is to maintain that goal. As of this post being typed, the GFM was at $1,265 raised. Which is incredibly exciting. My hope is that, through the generosity of our friends, family, and acquaintances, we can collect $3,000, with us saving an additional $3,000. So that outstanding medical bills from earlier this year can be paid off, and I can have a small cushion of recovery time after the dental extraction and implantation surgery.

Want to help us make it to our overall goal of $6,000? We will continue to dollar for dollar match donations made to the GoFundMe, up to the initial $3,000 goal on the GFM. Separate donations can be made, directly to my Venmo if you prefer, but please reach out to me directly to get that information.

I want to thank everyone who has shared/donated to the GoFundMe. The first $1,000 has been transferred, and we have used that to pay off a portion of my existing medical bills. I have been blessed with the most incredible health team here in Florida, so I have been able to get my medical maladies under control.

Now we want to continue moving forward with getting my teeth replaced. Ideally, we would get a loan to cover a complete replacement. We were declined for a Care Credit loan, because we do not own real estate. We will be reaching out to our bank in January, to secure a personal loan.

We are still trying to reach our GoFundMe goal of $3,000, as that overall amount will help me cover the rest of my medical bills, as well as any sick time I will need to take for the remainder of this year. I have exhausted all of my sick pto, and cannot use my flexible pto.

I have a medical procedure that I have to get done, which will likely not be covered by insurance. If you’re willing, please donate/share, so that I can cover it? It’s not related to my dental issues, but it will cut into my savings for my dental surgery.

I struggle with people who do not care enough to do their work effectively, as they are expected to do. I also struggle with people who carry an air of “this is how it has always been”; because it most often goes hand in hand with “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”. I despise that mentality. Just because something “works”, does not mean, that it is the most efficient way of doing things. It just causes frustration for staff, and consumers. Regardless of our industry, we should always be looking for ways to improve our selves, and the process. Never stagnate, because eventually, people are going to be put off. I have worked in the customer service industry for over 20 years. In that time, I have mostly enjoyed the work and companies that I have worked for. In that time, I have come to actually enjoy being on the “front-lines”. I want to be the person that gets to resolve the problem, the first time, and on time.

Last year, my husband and I did a cross country move, from Minnesota to Florida. I took some time, to really decide what I wanted to do with my work life, once we got settled in. I decided that I wanted to get back into technical customer service, preferably in help desk, or software support again. I was really excited to blow the dust off of my resume, and get back into the corporate structure. (I had left a corporate job in 2018, when I got my nail technician license.) One of the questions I asked every employer, that I interviewed with was, “How do YOU handle change?” Most of the companies that I interviewed with, were a little taken aback. Of course they were progressive, and they were constantly evolving. That’s not what I meant though.

I wanted to know, if they were always evaluating their training program. Were they utilizing their front-lines to integrate trending issues with existing policies, so that their scope of work was always evolving, to best assist their customer base? Were they taking the time in their team huddles, to ask their employees, if they had any input or insight on how to streamline the workload? Did the employees actually want to be there, or was this “just a paycheck” for them? Did those employees feel valued at all, or did they just feel like they were a cog in a machine, grinding out solutions based on what a manual told them to say?

Those can be tough questions to ask a company, but I think it’s necessary to the process. We need to be turning the tables, and interviewing companies, when we are invited to interview with them. I want to know that I am as much of a good fit for the company, as they would be a good fit for me. One of the most important things to me when looking for a new job, is knowing that the company I apply to work for, is willing to learn and grow alongside me. I don’t want to work for a company, that carries on safely with their heads in the sand.

I have been a minor internet personality since 2012, when I started a blog about sex, and being a geek. Which in full disclosure, was just a brag about my wild sex life. It was fun while it lasted, but as I began to settle down, talking about my sexual escapades, became less interesting. I wanted to stay relevant, about being a geek however. So I switched by focus, to what I loved about being a geek. I became more focused on video games, comic books, fantasy and science fiction novels. Through video games, I found an incredible community on Twitch. A ragtag group of misfits, became a Discord channel, which then grew into a small team of streamers on Twitch.

I am now a Twitch Affiliate, and as a streamer, I play video games and chat with followers. Who truthfully are mostly friends now. I strive to keep my chat and community all-inclusive, entertaining, and fun. I want to ensure that all of the other misfits and geeks, have a safe space to be themselves. As a Twitch Affiliate, I supplement my income with subscriptions revenue. All moneys earned through Twitch, is saved to cover the costs of PC maintenance, and game purchases.

Unfortunately, my pc can no longer handle gaming and streaming together, which cuts out approximately $150 a month, from my budget. I have been unable to apply for a loan to get a new pc, as my spouse and I are cleaning up our credit, to be better eligible for a medical loan, so that I can get my teeth replaced. We have started a GoFundMe asking our friends, family, and associates, to help us compensate for unpaid time off, and any necessary items that a medical loan will not cover.

The estimated cost of a full dental replacement, with implants, is approximately $32,000. We are asking for our community’s help, to raise a tenth of that ($3,000) to cover outstanding debt, that cannot be submitted under the aforementioned medical loan. I really appreciate all of the donations and shares that we have received so far. In the interest of full disclosure, at this time, a portion of the GFM funds raised, will be used to update or replace my existing PC.

I need a reliable computer, that I can efficiently use to start streaming again, to maintain my current subscribers base. This PC is also used for me to maintain the websites for our companies, as well as my editing services. Our intention with the current PC, is to turn it into a server/storage device for manuscripts, digital art, and VODS.

If you cannot donate, please give this a share for us? We are doing everything that we can, to take care of my dental health, and we sincerely appreciate all of the support we have been getting.